Download PDF The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse By Debbie Mirza
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Ebook About Do you feel confused and exhausted by a relationship, and you can’t figure out why?Do you feel like you can’t think straight, and the person in your life seems fine, so you wonder if maybe you are the problem?Has someone mentioned you might be with a narcissist, or you wonder yourself, and when you research narcissism, they don’t seem to completely fit the description, although some of the traits do ring true?The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist is the most comprehensive and helpful book on the topic of covert narcissism. Also available in Spanish as El Nacisista Pasivo Agresivo. Find the answers you are looking for. This book delivers: A list of traits of the covert narcissist and how they look like in daily lifeThe differences between an overt and a covert narcissistA checklist to see if you are with a covert narcissistReal-life stories to illustrate what these traits look likeExplanations of different covert techniques narcissists use to control and manipulateA chapter dedicated to what sex looks like with a covert narcissistDescriptions of covertly narcissistic parents Information on what it looks like to have a covertly narcissistic boss or co-workerA chapter on healing to help give you tools and hope for a beautiful future, free of toxic relationships.You will see that you are not crazy, that your instincts are correct, and you will learn how to see through covert manipulation and control. The most common description a survivor of this type of relationship will use is crazy-making. The emotional abuse and gaslighting makes you question your own view of reality, and sometimes your own sanity. You will know after reading this book if the person you are with is a covert narcissist, and your experience with them will begin to make sense for the first time.When most people think of a narcissist, they think of someone who is grandiose, obviously self-absorbed, sees themself as superior to others, and throws fits of rage when they don’t get their way. But what if the narcissist is one of the nicest people you’ve ever met? What if they are a great listener, seem to care about others, or are a pillar of the community? What if they are the mother that volunteers at the school, the husband that your friends wish they had, the boss that your co-workers feel so lucky to work for? Parents, spouses, partners, bosses, and friends who are covert narcissists come across as the nicest people. They can be spiritual leaders, therapists, moms who bring over casseroles to needy people, and bosses who everyone loves.A covert narcissist has the same traits of narcissism as the well-known overt type. The difference is when they control and manipulate, when they demean and devalue you, it is done in such a subtle way you don’t notice it.This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship with a covert narcissist that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused. There are no visible scars with this form of abuse, and you are usually the only one that experiences their destructive and psychologically debilitating behavior.Living with a covert narcissist drains your spirit and leaves you questioning your own reality. You have been lied to for years, and it is time to finally see the truth of what you have been through, who you really are, and how much you deserve love and happiness.Book The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse Review :
There are some good aspects of the book. The writer emphasizes the differences between overt and covert narcissists (most people are familiar with overts but not coverts). She provides a good list of covert characteristics and much encouragement and support for survivors of covert abuse. In some ways, it's a good "starter" book.But two major covert narc. characteristics were missing: pathological lying and infidelity (cheating). The author mentions that coverts "may" lie, but that's a serious understatement. Covert narcissists are masters of gaslighting, word salad, manipulation, deceit, and psychological abuse...which automatically includes lying and disloyalty. A big problem is that her "case studies" (examples of clients' stories) lack variety. They are people who were in long term marriages with a covert narc. For some reason, she overlooks the much larger population of victims who had dated coverts. As a survivor of over 7 years with a covert "boyfriend", I experienced a shocking degree of lying, deceit, and serial cheating. Coverts are psychopaths. Psychopaths are pathological liars and highly unfaithful. The author also fails to address "trauma bonding", another serious effect victims suffer, which feeds into the cognitive dissonance and makes breaking free extremely difficult. Anyone who has been or is in a relationship with a covert needs to learn about trauma bonding and understand how it's affecting them.I bought this book because it specifically focuses on covert narcissism. I'd hoped to gain more insights into my former relationship with a covert. I've done a lot of reading on the subject of psychopaths and narcissism which has helped me understand and deal with my situation. Unfortunately, I found this book lacks scope and depth on the subject. I write this review nearly a year after I was discarded by a CN. Beautiful soul, if you are looking for answers and you’re finding yourself, as I was, endlessly searching articles and videos for something to help you make sense of things, look no further. I highly recommend finding a therapist or life coach first. After all, we need to understand things about ourselves that attracted a CN to us in the first place (most of these being admirable traits). But this book is the best supplemental resource to help you reflect on your situation and understand the actions you need to take on your journey towards healing.I consider myself far along in my healing process. However, like the author, I had to do an enormous amount of digging and researching before discovering the term “Covert Narcissist” and what that entails. For someone suffering through a discard and the relentless barrage of abuse , it was like being blindfolded on the front line of a war zone; you know you’re being attacked, but you don’t know the terrain nor do you know the type of ammo being used against you. Everything is foreign. All you know is the person attacking you appears to have hijacked the mind, body, heart, and soul of the person you thought loved and cared about you. Pain like none other.Debbie Mirza has given us a gift by compiling everything into this book. Like she says, you will get through this and you will emerge better, stronger, and wiser... I know for a fact this is true. I cannot even begin to express the abundance of blessings that came about once I found clarity.Even though I read this book already knowing how beautiful healing feels, I still gained so much. It helped me further refine my understanding of the dynamics between CNs and their targets, as well as knowing what I need to do for myself to prevent toxic people from entering my life again.My only wish is that this book was available to me when I was at rock bottom, feeling isolated and alone.Wishing you a blessed journey along your path to healing. 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